Some days it is hard to believe that Mark has been gone for 12 weeks and other days it seems an eternity!! I have spent a little time re-reading a few of my blog and FB posts from the past 12 weeks and am happy to say that I seem to be exiting the 'debilitating' stage of shock and grief and am entering a newer season of acceptance!
Yes, there continue to be many moments of tears but overall I am doing quite well! I have been cooking (most evenings) and *beginning* to dig in to the numerous tasks which need attention around the house. I had the pool gears changed and drained it yesterday. Tomorrow will be a power wash day and then I need to pick up all new filters and various other items to restart the pool when I fill it. Looking forward to using it this year! Last year was so filled with 'hospital' time that I only put my suit on twice!
I am working on changing up my blog a little! (Those 'changes' I spoke about) I need to be focused right now so I'm working on a way to help me in that area regarding my blog. I hope to keep away from the random difficult day posts!!
Mark was my life for more than 30 years and I miss his something horrible but the reality is that he is not coming back and I Must find some sense of who I am in Christ 'today'!!!
My oldest told me how proud he is of me today ~~~ just made this momma's heart melt!
I found this picture as I was going through files tonight. It's a fun one from a few Christmas' ago. K-bug lost her two front teeth when she was 2. They are finally coming in now that she is almost 7. Papa loved that little angel SO much!!
Considering Change and Trying To Catch Up To It,
Cindy
Your son has made this momma's heart melt too. I am in awe of you - so proud too. Your openness to your grief, the knowledge that Mark is with Jesus and the expectancy at finding out who God will have you be now ... these are all things to be joyful about. As always, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Pxo
ReplyDeleteI am so proud of you too!! I am excited to see your new blog changes :)
ReplyDeleteI'm proud proud proud sweet friend! Love you bunches and bunches. (sorry..I'm having one of those repetitive words kinda days days)
ReplyDeleteCindy, I think you are doing awesome considering it's not been that long since you lost your precious Mark. I'm proud of you too girl.
ReplyDeleteBlessings and love,
Debbie
Wow, 12 weeks!! You're right it does seem like an eternity and yet not so far away. I know it's hard but you are a picture of God's grace.
ReplyDeleteI recently made a new bloggy friend and she also lost her sweet hubby 3 years ago after 30 years of marriage. Her blog has been a tremendous blessing to me, especially one of her latest posts about Heaven. It might bless you too.
http://mla-crownofglory.blogspot.com/2011/03/we-will-dance.html
Bless you, sweet Cindy and may you continue to feel God's presence as He walks you through the valley of grief.
Hi Cindy, I've visited you before. so sorry for your loss. Everything you say sounds perfectly normal to me. I haven't walked in your shoes but I have experienced loss and it IS a process. 12 weeks isn't very long, really...I hope you will continue to find daily strength in the Lord and through His people. Your new look here is great! Keep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteHi, Cindy!
ReplyDeleteI've been wondering how you've been and I'm glad to FINALLY stop by your blog on a day when you told us. I cannot imagine what you are going through but it sounds like you are solid in Him. I LOVE the picture with no front teeth! Glad they are finally coming in. Enjoy that pool & maybe this is the Summer to get that piercing! ;)
Love,
Angie xoxo
p.s. Has anyone told you lately how pretty you are? It's true!